Love Languages

Several years ago, Gary Chapman authored the world renowned book The Five Love Languages
Of all the books that I have read regarding marriage relationships, this particular one has had the most impact on the perception I have in my relationship with my husband. Mr. Chapman has basically summed up how individuals express and receive love from others. He narrowed it to five love languages. Briefly, they are defined as follows...

1. Words of Affirmation- You feel loved when another person tells you that he or she values you as a person and appreciates your special way with the most ordinary tasks.
2. Quality Time- You feel closest to another person when you receive focused attention.
3. Receiving Gifts- Tangible expressions of love assure you that the other person is not only thinking of you, but that he or she cares enough to show it.
4. Acts of Service- You feel most loved when someone helps you carry out your responsibilities.
5. Physical Touch- You feel most love when you literally make contact with another person. You enjoy being embraced and feeling another's touch.

My primary love language is Receiving Gifts. I am not a "pack rat" and tend to over organize my home, from time to time. However, there are items that I have held onto, because they were special gifts from dear people in my life.

My husband can express all day long that he likes how clean our home is, how much he appreciates that I cook dinner every night, that he never needs to worry about laundry being done. Though all of those words are precious compliments and much appreciated, I can live my life without ever hearing them.

On the other hand, he can bring home a favorite candle of mine and it is as if you just gave me a ticket to the moon. Hence a post from a couple of days ago, you saw the new scent that he picked up on his way home from work. I will treasure it until the last wax is melted away!
Two nights ago, my husband suggested, out of the blue, that we go to our favorite Fish House for dinner. I was so thrilled! I grabbed my purse, we kissed our children good-bye (this was a date night for us!) and off we went. I soaked up the drive there, winding through back country roads, the atmosphere of the restaurant, and even the drive home! My love tank was full!
That is a term Mr. Chapman uses to describe our inner selves - a love tank. When you concentrate on speaking your spouses love language, their tank fills up. Well, my sweet husband has more than concentrated on filling my "love tank" over the past several days and though this may sound self centered, I have felt like a princess!

If you currently do not own this book - I would highly recommend that you get a copy! Even if you have the greatest marriage on the planet and you never argue, fuss or butt heads on matters, even still, you need to read it! My husband and I joke about being poster children for learning things the hard way ... we have benefited more than I can say, due to the insight we have gained, by studying this book, together.